If you've slid into second wearing shorts or if you've ever learned to rollerblade, you probably know the joy of having a big, old scab. After the first few days, when the wound has started to heal, there's nothing quite as addictive - or strangely satisfying - as picking off the little pieces. (And somehow, the pain only makes it better. Or maybe that's just me.)
Anyway, if you happen to be sporting a scab right now, this month's tasty treat is sure to disgust friends and neighbors alike. They're called scab cookies. But you certainly don't need a scab to serve these "healing" morsels.
Here's what you'll need:
Prepare cookies according to the instructions on the package. While they're baking, carefully tear raisins into various shapes and sizes of scabs. Try to get your scabs good and flat. You might have to really pound them down to get that perfect scab look. After the cookies are done baking, place several scabs onto each cookie before it cools.
Finally, start a gross discussion about scabs with your friends. Then innocently ask if they'd like a cookie and watch the hilarity ensue. (Hint: Scabs go great with milk-or prune juice.)
And if you want to go that extra gross mile, apply one of your scabs to a clean spot on your body and cover it with a clean, medication-free bandage. Later, as your most cherished loved ones look on, peel back the bandage, pick off the scab, smell it, and throw it in your mouth. (Make sure not to confuse your raisin-scab with any real ones you may happen to have.)
Now for a biblical reach that Stretch Armstrong would be proud of:
Proverbs 27:6 says, "Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses."
Solomon's point is that even when a good friend hurts you, you know he or she wants the best for you in the long run. Maybe you've had a friend confront you about a wrong turn you've made. That hurts - but it's for your good.
An enemy, on the other hand, will lie to you all day about how great you are - if it will help them to take advantage of you. You can't trust even the good words (or "kisses") of an enemy.
Hopefully, you're the kind of friend who offers wounds that can be trusted - as well as tasty scab cookies.